If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?
Similarly, if Gabi is voted out of Tough Enough, does anyone care? Probably not. Good bye to the “bad girl” who really wasn’t bad, really wasn’t good, and really wasn’t there. Her fate was sealed when she thought cutting a promo was staring out into the deep abyss of nothingness and mumbling a few sentences about a person standing nearby.
I’ve been pretty hard on the show so far, but the last two episodes have been a step up from the first two, and part of it is the elimination of the non-factors and non-personalities. Gabi was dead weight who promised to cause drama and create conflict, and she did none of that. She also had zero chance to win (more on that in our Power Rankings), so really this is just like cutting the fat. Let’s talk about the rest of the episode.
Things started off with an interesting twist-and by interesting I mean stupid. Since Diana quit last week, she was replaced by another contestant, Chelsea. Why is this stupid? First of all, she essentially had 3 weeks of immunity by getting placed into the show at the start of week 4. Second, she’s already been on WWE TV in a terrible angle and she was not very good. You may remember her as Daniel Bryan’s alleged mistress!
The good news for Chelsea is that the contestants didn’t seem to mind her showing up, really hammering home that this is all arbitrary and mindless. You’d think the girls would at least be upset that their chances of winning were just decreased, but they were probably mentally prepping for an upcoming challenge that has no relevance on the actual outcome of the show. SPEAKING OF CHALLENGES….
Our first challenge this week is at least beneficial for wrestling training, as the contestants are taken to a night out at the improv. They probably expected killer sets from Dolph Ziggler, but were instead told that this is a promo battle. They were paired off and told to cut promos against each other. Some highlights included Mada going bug-eyed and shouting in either unintelligible english or another language. Either way, it was at least pretty intense. Patrick did a good job as well, and Josh at least showed some personality. The ladies left a lot to be desired, with the “best” moments being Gabi giving a speech to the crowd and Sara Lee once again doing terribly and getting a seasoned pro to yell at her.
After the challenge, Patrick got into it with Josh and Mada, and cut a better promo on them in the melee than he did during the competition. I feel as if everything Patrick says and does is very calculated. He knows this is a fan vote, and he is coming off as a likable underdog, which is a fast track to victory over the big lugs.
We also had some in ring training, which the show should feature much more of. This week, they learned how to lift and be lifted in a basic body slam. It looked simple enough, but some struggled. Chelsea was the most polished of the females, probably something she picked up while she was in the midst of a torrid love affair with Daniel Bryan. The guys all seemed pretty solid as well, and this would be a pretty uneventful segment….if it wasn’t for the epic failures of Sara Lee. She repeatedly made mistakes, frustrating the coaches and the contestants before finally getting ONE spot right.
Throughout the show, we got some words from the judges. None of them are impressed with Sara Lee, and Paige seems to hate her with the fire of a thousand suns. This was made evident when we went to our bottom 3 nominations, as Paige went WAY over the top in bashing Sara Lee. I feel like Paige has gone from being natural to very manufactured here, and that’s a big downgrade for me. Of course, Sara Lee is picked in the bottom, as well as the human promo machine Gabi and, surprisingly, Tanner.
All 3 contestants were asked to cut a 30 second promo on the judge that nominated them, and this was high comedy. Gabi started reciting fun facts about herself, ignoring Daniel Bryan completely. Tanner cut 7 seconds of a promo before Hulk Hogan took up the rest of his time. And then, Paige decided to start yelling at Sara Lee, causing Sara Lee to “snap” and cut an intense promo on Paige! By this, I mean she walked towards her, trying not to smile the entire time. Paige responded with an emphatic slow clap, and I puked in my mouth.
As already discussed, Gabi went home, but there’s a bigger issue here. The show is clearly painting Sara Lee as someone who isn’t ready, unable to compete and not deserving to be there. They definitely don’t want her to win…..but she’s going to. It’s actually quite funny to watch unfold, as her only competition is a generic blonde in Amanda, a generic brunette in Giorgia and a non-factor in Chelsea. Sara Lee is going to win the female side of this show, and production is going to kick and scream the entire way. It should be fun!
Now, let’s rank these folks! As always, we’ve got two sets of rankings: My own and my son Isaac’s.
JD’s Power Rankings:
1-Sara Lee-This is not based on her skills, as the show has gone out of it’s way to show she has none. It’s because she has basically already won unless they rig it.
2-Patrick-Still unsure if he can beat ZZ, but Patrick is the more polished performer and seems to be a bigger fan.
3-Mada-I think Mada is underrated. He’s got a nice story with his family back home, he’s unique looking and he has some personality. I don’t think he’ll win, but I think we’ll see him on WWE TV.
4-ZZ-Was mostly MIA this episode so I can’t put him any higher.
5-Josh-He seems to have a decent sense of humor.
6-Tanner-I actually thought he may have been eliminated last night. Playing the heel on a show where fans decide who goes home is not smart.
7-Amanda– She seems competent enough, but if she wasn’t on any episodes, would it make a difference?
8-Giorgia-The dark haired version of: She seems competent enough, but if she wasn’t on any episodes, would it make a difference?
9-Chelsea-No shot, even though she seems to have some legit training.
Isaac’s Power Rankings:
1-Patrick– My favorite. He destroys everybody!
2-Sara Lee– She’s going to win.
3-Mada– I liked his promos.
4-ZZ- Really funny.
6-Chelsea- She was really good in the body slam challenge.
7-Tanner- He’s cocky and annoys me!
8-Amanda- I didn’t even remember she was there.
9-Giorgia-She’s just generic and terrible.
Tune in next week to see who the WWE gets to yell at Sara Lee as she survives another vote and infuriates Kevin Dunn or whoever is running this thing!