We’ve all done this. We’ve all sat around the campfire, water-cooler, sacrifice pit and meticulously tried to re-book the Granddaddy of the all. Brilliant idea after brilliant idea has flowed from the minds of countless brilliant people which made us at Place To Be Nation sit up and say, “We’re somewhat brilliant. We can piece together two or three coherent sentences. Surely we can book an all time classic like WrestleMania IX.” So welcome To the Great WrestleMania Re-Book. For each of the 30 celebrations of life (TM WWF 1999) Justin Rozzero, Aaron George, Steven Graham, Nick Duke, Brian Bayless, Trent Williams, and Glenn Butler, give you their versions of each showcase of the immortals. In order to ensue a different spin with this thing here’s a few rules we’ve all sworn a blood-oath to uphold:
– For any given year you can have NO MATCHES THAT WERE ON THE ORIGINAL CARD. So WrestleMania III say goodbye to Savage/Steamboat and Hogan/Andre cause we have to come up with something completely different.
– For every year YOU MUST RESPECT THE CURRENT CHAMPIONS GOING INTO THE EVENT. So even if it hurts our hearts Miz is still champ going into 27, Triple H still has his reign of terror at XIX and Cena is still champ going into 36.
– As much as we are sticklers for the given circumstances and champions we may CHANGE THE WINNER OF THE ROYAL RUMBLE. Otherwise we’d be unable to follow rule number one from 1993-2003. Imagine we’re booking the show as of January 1st.
IF A CELEBRITY WRESTLES/BOXES A PHYSICAL MATCH AT A GIVEN SHOW, HE/SHE MUST HAVE A MATCH AT THE SHOWS WE BOOK. Sorry, no getting out of seeing Snooki “compete.”
– Aside from that we are free to USE ANY MEMBER OF THE ROSTER AT THE TIME THAT WAS HEALTHY OR SCRATCH SOMEONE FROM THE CURRENT CARD IF WE FEEL THEY DON’T FIT AND/OR HATE THEM.
– Unless it’s specified by the given author EVERY ONE OF THESE CARDS LIVES IN IT’S OWN UNIVERSE. Otherwise this could very quick descend into 30 years of fantasy booking instead of seeing what we could each make with the given circumstances. If a butterfly effect is enacted it will be mentioned but I think we’ll keep it to a respectable minimum.
So there’re our awful, rigid, back-breaking rules. Without further ado, here’s the Great WrestleMania Re-Book!
PHILADELPHIA – MARCH 28TH 1999
THE ORIGINAL CARD
1. Hardcore Holly d. Billy Gunn (c) Al Snow – WWF Hardcore Title
2. Owen Hart & Jeff Jarrett (c) d. D’Lo Brown & Test – WWF Tag Titles
3. Butterbean d. Bart Gunn – Brawl For All Match
4. Mankind d. Paul Wight by DQ
5. The Road Dogg (c) d. Ken Shamrock, Goldust and Val Venis – Intercontinental Title
6. Kane d. Triple H by DQ
7. Sable (c) d. Tori – WWF Women’s Title
8. Shane McMahon (c) d. X-Pac – WWF European Title
9. The Undertaker d. The Big Boss Man – Hell In A Cell
10. “Stone Cold” Steve Austin d. The Rock (c) – WWF Title
1. Owen Hart & Jeff Jarrett (c) d. Legion of Doom – WWF Tag Team Titles
2. Hardcore Holly d. Al Snow, Billy Gunn (c), Goldust, Godfather, Steve Blackman, Test, D-Lo Brown, Droz, Big Boss Man, Rocco Rock, Johnny Grunge & Bart Gunn – WWF Hardcore Title Battle Royal
3. Big Show d. Butterbean – Wrestler vs. Boxer
4. Sable (c) d. Ivory – WWF Women’s Title
5. Val Venis d. Road Dogg (c) – WWF Intercontinental Title
6. Ken Shamrock d. “Dr. Death” Steve Williams – Submission Match
7. Triple H d. X-Pac *
8. Undertaker d. Kane
9. Steve Austin d. Mr. McMahon – Steel Cage Match
10. Mankind d. The Rock (c) – WWF Title First Blood; Special Referee Shawn Michaels
* Triple & Chyna turned heel prior to WrestleMania
** Mankind defeated Mr. McMahon at February PPV to win his WrestleMania title shot
1. Jeff Jarrett & Owen Hart d. Edge & Christian – WWF Tag Team Titles
2. Mankind d. Billy Gunn(c) – WWF Hardcore Title
Mankind is determined to show Billy Gunn what it means to be hardcore after Gunn inexplicably won the title.
3. Paul Wight d. The Road Dogg (c) – Intercontinental Title
Wight earned this shot by helping The Rock against Mankind in the ladder match on Raw.
4. Triple H d. Shane McMahon – WWF European Title
Hunter brings the belt back to DX.
5. The Undertaker d. Dr. Death Steve Williams
A stiff brawl where Dr. Death comes very, very close to ending the streak that has not been mentioned yet.
6. Ken Shamrock Vs. Butterbean – Shoot Fight
I can’t book a winner since it’s just a fight. Let’s see what happens.
7. The Acolytes d. The Hardy Boyz
The men throw the boys around for seven minutes or so.
8. The Rock (c) d. X-Pac – WWF Title
A heartbreaking loss as X-Pac comes within seconds of winning the title on multiple occasions.
9. Chyna d. Sable (c) – WWF Women’s Title
10. “Stone Cold” Steve Austin d. Vince McMahon – Steel Cage
After a year of ducking it finally happens here. McMahon is beaten to a bloody pulp and Austin stands tall.
What a dismal show WrestleMania XV is. Outside of Austin-Rock nothing is well built up or good. You actually had the Hardcore and IC Title matches built up, but the Raw before this show you switched the champions leaving two heatless match. This show stinks, but I am going to do my best with this mess and within the rules.
1. Goldust d. Val Venis
The two left out of the Intercontinental Title match. This would be a real good opener.
2. Owen Hart & Jeff Jarrett (c) d. Edge & Christian – WWF Tag Titles
There was no real good opponents set and this would at least be a fun match.
3. Butterbean d. Jerry “The King” Lawler – Tough Guy Contest
Who better to make a celebrity look good than The King? He would mouth off get knocked out and we can all laugh and be entertained.
4. “Dr. Death” Steve Williams d. Steve Blackman
Two real tough guys going at it.
5. Road Dogg (c) d. Billy Gunn (c) – WWF Hardcore-Intercontinental Title
Both titles are on the line here. The story would be these two tag partners trying to show who is the real leader of the team.
6. Triple H d. X-Pac
They can do their Backlash match here. A real good match, and since it’s crash TV there is no harm on pushing these forward a month.
7. The Undertaker d. Ken Shamrock – Lumberjack Match
The Ministry against The Corporation with all the members at ringside. These two would keep in the ring anyway. They can do their faux-MMA match like they did at Backlash.
8. “Stone Cold” Steve Austin d. Paul Wight
They wasted this match on Raw? Do it here and if Austin wins he gets to face Mr. McMahon.
9. “Stone Cold” Steve Austin d. Mr. McMahon
Austin destroys Vince and it’s great.
10. The Rock (c) d. Mankind – WWF Title Hell In A Cell
Let’s end this feud properly. If you can’t do Rock-Austin, this is your next best bet.
1. X-Pac d. The Big Boss Man
2. Christian d. Gillberg (c) – WWF Light Heavyweight Title
3. Kane d. Ken Shamrock
4. Butterbean d. Dr. Death Steve Williams – Brawl For All
5. Shane McMahon (c) d. Val Venis – WWF European Title
6. Sable (c) defeats Chyna – WWF Women’s Title
7. The Undertaker w/ Paul Bearer d. Triple H
8. The New Age Outlaws (IC and HC C) d. Owen Hart and Jeff Jarrett (Tag Team C) – Intercontinental Title, European Title and Tag Team Titles Hardcore Match
9. Stone Cold Steve Austin d. The Big Show
10. Mankind d. The Rock (c) – WWF Title
1. Acolytes d. Goldust & Blue Meanie
2. Hardcore Holly d. Billy Gunn (c) – WWF Hardcore Title
3. Val Venis d. Steve Blackman
4. Butterbean d. Gillberg
5. Undertaker d. Ken Shamrock
6. Kane & X-Pac d. Jeff Jarrett & Owen Hart (c) – WWF Tag Team Titles
7. Sable (c) d. Jacqueline d. Ivory d. Tori – WWF Women’s Title
8. Road Dogg (c) d. D’Lo Brown – WWF Intercontinental Title
9. Big Show d. Test
10. Steve Austin d. Rock (c) d. Mankind – WWF Heavyweight Title
It sucks we have to keep the champions the same because I hate that The New Age Outlaws are broke up and are in two meaningless matches.
1. Hardcore Holly def Billy Gunn (c) – WWF Hardcore Title
2. The Big Boss Man & Test d. The Acolytes
3. Jeff Jarrett & Owen Hart (c) w/ Debra d. D’Lo Brown & The Godfather – WWF Tag Team Titles
4. Kane d. Butterbean
Really couldn’t come up with anything better for Butterbean than to get squashed by Kane.
5. Ken Shamrock d. Road Dogg (c) – Intercontinental
6. Sable (c) d. Tori, Jacqueline w/ Terri Runnels, & Luna Vachon – WWF Women’s Title Fatal 4 Way
Since the Tori v.s. Sable match was God awful I put them in there with two veterans who could hopefully make this match somewhat watchable.
7. Val Venis d. Goldust w/ Blue Meanie
Winner gets Ryan Shamrock
8. Shane McMahon & Chyna d. Triple H & X-Pac
I would actually do the same thing that happened at WrestleMania XV with the whole DX Split and Corporation thing, except I would have it be X-Pac that turns on Triple H, since he was super over at the time and if he would have been pushed the right way could have been more than what he ended up, putting him in a stable with Vince and having him feud with the top names babyfaces as the punk who sold out to the corporation.
9. The Undertaker w/ Paul Bearer d. Paul Wight w/ Vince McMahon
I would have this feud start the night after St Valentine’s Day Massacre where Vince would be pissed at The Big Show for causing Austin to win the match. He starts to trash talk Show, but Show asks him for one more chance and saying he will do whatever dirty work Vince needs done. So Vince says there is someone screwing with him and his family and he wants him taken out and that man is The Undertaker so he makes the match for WrestleMania. After Big Show loses to Undertaker at Mania I would have Vince do the same thing he did where he slaps Show for losing and being a screw up twice and then Big Show punches him and turns babyface.
10. Steve Austin def The Rock (c) & Mankind – WWF Title Triple Threat
So I really didn’t want to change this main event, so I did what I think Mick Foley said in his book was the original plan and made it a 3 way match with the same outcome.
1. Al Snow def. Road Dogg (c) – WWF Intercontinental Title
2. The Legion of Doom def. The Public enemy
3. Owen Hart & Jeff Jarrett (c) def. The Hardy Boyz – WWF Tag Titles
4. Gillberg (c) def. Brian Christopher – WWF Light Heavyweight Title
5. Steve Blackman def. HHH
6. Kane def. Big Bossman
7. Undertaker def. Shane McMahon (c) – WWF European Title
8. Chyna def. Sable (c) – WWF Women’s Title
9. Butterbean def. Billy Gunn (c) – WWF Hardcore Title
10. Steve Austin def. Big Show
11. Mankind def. The Rock (c) – WWF World Title, Cage Match
After trading the title back and forth, and after Mankind’s endured months of abuse, it’s The War to Settle the Score! I figure we can take out one or two of their previous matches (maybe feature another feud during Halftime Heat) so this is still a hot feud.
Thanks for joining us for this installment of The Great WrestleMania Re-Book. Feel free to keep the discussion going at the Place To Be Nation Facebook page. Tune in next time for WrestleMania XVI! In the meantime, catch up on our previous re-books: