Monday Night Raw
September 23, 2013
Chicago, Illinois
We first hear from Vince who honors Angelo Savoldi, an old school wrestler who died last week at the age of 99. We then recap what happened at Night of Champions and last week on Raw with Daniel Bryan, Scott Armstrong and Triple H. We then see the locker room of babyfaces revolt and save Daniel from a Shield beatdown. We go live where the ten superstars who interfered last week on the stage. Down comes Triple H and Stephanie McMahon. Now Hunter comes down to his regular music. Come on HHH, make up your mind. Which theme are you going with? The Shield is standing at the end of the ramp near the ring. Both put the crowd over, then point out the ten superstars at the stage. Triple H thanks the ten guys for stepping up to the plate, even though it had nothing to do with Daniel Bryan. Rob Van Dam comes up to the mike and says it was about Daniel Bryan and how Triple H has screwed him over. Hunter tries to play mind games and say they should want to be WWE Champion, not help a WWE Champion. Both bosses point out a few guys and says it’s the Shield that have stopped these ten from their successes. Triple H decided tonight these ten men will have a 10-on-3 handicap match with the Shield. They decide to make it 11-on-3 by adding Daniel Bryan to the mix. Stephanie then says the WWE Universe will decide on who faces Randy Orton tonight. The choices are R-Truth, Dolph Ziggler and Rob Van Dam. The Shield looks a little confused about this.
MATCH: Kofi Kingston vs. Alberto Del Rio
The WWE App announced this match during the break. The guys at the table go over how to download the WWE App on an Android device. They rotate that every week, as next week they’ll do it with an iPhone. I wonder if Kofi will be like Ricky Steamboat and never be a heel? I think he’d be a cool heel if he changed his persona a bit. The announcers are analyzing the opening segment and Jerry is wondering if its fair that the Shield is the ones getting the short end of the stick. Either they’re turning face (unlikely) or we see a schmozz later (likely). Del Rio has gotten into a good heel groove since the summertime. This feud with RVD has been solid. The match goes back and forth early then Del Rio takes control with body kicks. They go back and forth and the pace really picks up, as Del Rio ducked a kick and hit a German Suplex. Koft reverses a Tilt a Whirl into a DDT for two. Del Rio eventually recovers and cranks the armbar for the victory. That was a fun little match. WINNER: Alberto Del Rio
Back from break and Renee Young is with The Miz. We go back to the Miz’s beatdown by Randy Orton last week in Miz’s hometown with his parents watching. Miz was about to comment, but Triple H interrupts. He can’t give the Miz a match against Randy Orton, but he will give Miz a Miz TV segment with the Big Show.
We recap the Rhodes family saga.
MATCH: Primetime Players vs. Rowan & Harper
Bray Wyatt is at ringside in the rocking chair. This match has been a glorified squash, until at one point the lights dim out, then come back on. The family wins when Harper crushes Titus with a clothesline. WINNERS: The Wyatt Family
Bray Wyatt runs into the ring and attacks Darren Young, hitting Abigail’s Kiss. Follow the Buzzards! So it seems the premise tonight is that all of Daniel Bryan’s partners in the main event get beat down so bad they can’t participate.
Back from break and out comes a sore and surly Miz, who has been pretty much ordered to do a Miz TV segment with Big Show. Miz says he’s banged up and pissed off so he’s not smiling. He recaps last week where he was humiliated. Miz tells Randy Orton that payback will be awesome. Big Show comes out and Miz asks Big Show why he did what he did to Dusty Rhodes last week. Miz says Triple H and Stephanie are trying to break him because he’s the biggest guy. Miz says the rest of the roster is stepping up and Show should to. Miz calls her a castrating witch, which brings Mrs. Triple H out. The Miz says what he said will slide. She says Miz is slanderous to Big Show. Miz tells her to take the legal threats and shove them up her ass. Stephanie humiliates Miz and calls him a “utility player” and tells him he’s a disappointing loser. She orders Big Show to knock him out and this time Big Show doesn’t hesitate and drops Miz with one punch. Does this mean he’s gone or something? I hope so.
MATCH: Randy Orton vs. Rob Van Dam
Jerry Lawler called Orton the WWE Champion. Good grief Jerry get a clue. RVD got 57% of the vote from the WWE Universe. Tonight for once Michael Cole and JBL are truly arguing over the Triple H situation. Usually they start the debate and then stop in mid-thought. Tonight they are really going at it. Orton is dominating RVD throughout the first portion of this match. RVD makes comebacks and is getting close two counts and drilling Orton with kicks to the face consistently. Orton starts beating RVD down outside though and both men get counted out. WINNERS: Double Countout
Orton starts ripping the barricade open, and suplexes RVD on it. Orton throws RVD into the steel steps. Orton beats on RVD’s face, then throws him into more stairs. Orton then throws RVD into the announce table. Orton takes the announce table apart and drags RVD over it. Both are now in the ring and Orton drapes RVD on the top rope. He hits the hanging DDT off the top rope. So it is the premise. All of Daniel Bryan’s partners in the handicap match tonight are being dissected. I find this expert booking, as it’s very subtle.
Back from break with a Los Matadores vignette. They debut next week.
During the break Alberto Del Rio attacked Rob Van Dam as he was being helped from the ring.
We get a commercial for WWE 2K14.
The Bellas are talking and Randy Orton antagonizes Brie about Daniel Bryan. So it’s official, the Bellas are babyfaces. This company can be so pathetic sometimes.
We watch clips of Stephanie and Triple H’s wedding from the “Thy Kingdom Come” DVD. COMES OUT TOMORROW! In comes Divas Champion AJ Lee. Stephanie gives AJ the DVD so she can see a real wedding. AJ could care less, then says she doesn’t want to be in a 10-divas tag match with the Total Divas chicks. Stephanie says if she doesn’t take part she won’t be Divas Champion much longer. Now she’s acting babyface. MAKE UP YOUR MIND!!! This back and forth booking is stupid.
MATCH: Fandango vs. Santino Marella
Santino is on a two match winning streak! Oh and Los Matadores is NOT trending on Twitter. That is easily a bold faced lie. Santino gets control and pulls out the Cobra. Summer Rae distracts and Fandango hits him. Off the top rope with the Tennessee Jam but Santino stops him. Fandango dumps him to the canvas and hits the leg drop for the win. WINNER: Fandango
We get the big pop returning from break as out comes hometown hero CM Punk, wearing a Blackhawks jersey. Dammit Punk! That Game 6 meltdown still haunts this staunch Bruins fan. It’s also been announced that Punk will face Ryback at Battleground. He says the crowd ruined his perfectly bad mood. He puts over his Blackhawks as the Stanley Cup Champions. He wanted the Cup here tonight. Way to salt my wounds Punk. He says that he feels he’s let everyone down lately. He technically lost to Paul Heyman at Night of Champions. He right now wonders if he can do this anymore. He says he’s not sure if he can say he’s from Chicago anymore. He makes a great comparison to the Blackhawks in last year’s playoffs when they came back down 3-1 against Detroit and won in seven games. He says those in Chicago may lose but they pick themselves up, and he will do the same thing dammit! This is another awesome spirited promo. It’s of course cut off by the awesome Paul Heyman in his motorized scooter. Punk says tonight is not the night and 18,000 will bail him out of jail when he kicks Paul’s ass. Paul says he doesn’t need to be reminded of the Detroit beatdown. He says he’s in physical therapy and he had a relapse, thus the scooter. He says its not Punk’s fault he lost at Night of Champions. He puts down Chicago as second best in everything, including second best in the world. Heyman shows a still shot of Night of Champions when Heyman pinned Punk after Ryback put him through the table. Punk says he’s not stupid, he knows how this will end. He asks Heyman if his two goons will get to Heyman before he does. Two seconds will be more than enough time. Heyman mouths off about being Punk with both hands behind his back. He tries to leave but the scooter won’t work. Punk runs after Heyman but Curtis Axel and Ryback run from the crowd and attack Punk. This is the start of a pretty good stable for Heyman, and he needs one more. Punk tries to fight back and throws Axel into the LED lights. He jumps off the stage and attacks Ryback. Punk just can’t catch up to the numbers. Ryback starts beating Punk down near the lighting equipment off stage. He lifts Punk over his head and drops him on a table. These past six weeks of Raws remind me of Federation years programming. Heels dominating free TV. Heyman gets off the scooter, gives Ryback the microphone and he says “This is what happens to bullies”. WHY IS HE TALKING????
CM Punk is getting help from officials while all the divas get in the ring for their 10-divas crap tag match
MATCH: Total Divas vs. Heel Divas & AJ
I’m not listing all the divas, you know who they are. It’s the same 10 divas every week. I’m still pissed the Bellas are faces now. How predictable. Brie Bella pins AJ with the X-Factor. That’s horrible. WINNERS: Who gives a shit
We get a You Tube vignette on the RKO? Thirty RKO’s in thirty seconds. Cool to watch.
Renee Young is with the Shield. Dean Ambrose says they are the hounds that chases the wolves. 11-on-3 doesn’t worry them. Ambrose is easily the top guy in this trio.
Back from break and out comes Daniel Bryan to a big pop. He puts over the crowd, then talks about what happened last week. He does find it weird that Scott Armstrong got paid a lot of money after getting fired. Daniel Bryan says he doesn’t care and at Battleground he will win the WWE Title again with no shenanigans. Bryan says he’s tired of Randy Orton hiding behind his bosses’ skirts. He gets a YES chant going until his opponents come out. The Shield hop the ramp when out of nowhere Goldust and Cody Rhodes attack the Shield. A myriad of officials come out to break it up. That was friggin’ awesome.
MATCH: Usos, Primetime Players, RVD, Kofi Kingston, Dolph Ziggler, Zack Ryder, Justin Gabriel, R-Truth & Daniel Bryan vs. The Shield
So I was wrong, all the guys are out here. I overthought that one. I considered that maybe the WWE writers would think of that, but instead most of those guys wrestled tonight for nothing. RVD is eliminated first. Kofi was eliminated as the Shield beat on his injured arm from earlier in the night. So the thinking I guess now is the Shield will be put over here as beasts. Titus O’Neil is eliminated with a Reigns spear. Justin Gabriel is eliminated with a Reigns spear. Ryder goes for a boot and he is speared down for a pin. Reigns is an animal. Bryan is tagged in and he goes bonkers, taking all of them out. He tags Jey Uso who drops Reigns with a spear and Jimmy Uso finishes with a top rope splash. First time ever Roman Reigns has been pinned. After the second commercial break the match slows a bit. Darren Young is eliminated with a Rollins knee to the head. It’s announced that Friday on Smackdown Dolph Ziggler gets another crack at Ambrose’s US Title. Those two men go at it for a while, until Ziggler pins Ambrose with a Zig Zag. So it’s now 5-on-1. Rollins starts by pinning R-Truth by stepping on his head. The remaining four faces start stalking the ring area and eventually all four guys attack Rollins. Reigns and Ambrose come back but the Usos take them out. Rollins and Bryan battle in the ring and Bryan hits a flying head butt. Bryan hits the flying knee and Rollins is pinned. WINNERS: Daniel Bryan & the rest of the babyfaces
Daniel Bryan gets the crowd going and Michael Cole says there’s a new locker room leader. With that we’re out.
SCOTT”S TAKE: A few long promos on this show with some solid matches in between. The Triple H “diplomacy” thing is pretty cool in that the heel work is subtle but again Stephanie is overkill.
