Scott’s Impact Recap 6/27/13

Austin Aries wins the X-Division Title, as SUICIDE? (Courtesty TNA Wrestling)
Austin Aries wins the X-Division Title, as SUICIDE? (Courtesty TNA Wrestling)

Impact Wrestling
June 27, 2013
Peoria, Illinois

We recap last week’s episode when the BFG Series kicked off, and the Main Event Mafia is being rebuilt. We are in Peoria as Mike welcomes us with X-Division and Knockouts Title matches to come. We begin with the head of the Main Event Mafia, Sting. He says “Bully Ray I warned you that the MEM would rise and grow. I promise you last week was just a taste of what was to come.” With that he brings out Kurt Angle, in his own suit and the MEM music. Kurt says “We fought for power and the World Title four years ago. The MEM was all former World Heavyweight Champions.” He says “Because of Aces & Eights, Sting can never be a World Champion again, and I was screwed out of Bound for Glory.” Kurt continues that “Family comes and goes, but he and Sting stick together.” Their priorities: End Aces & Eights and take back the World Title from Bully Ray. Tonight the newest member of the family will be revealed. Taz is trying to talk around this but he sounds pretty silly.

Chris Sabin is walking to the ring for his title match, when DOC from Aces & Eights grabs him from behind and drags him into an empty trailer where Anderson and Bully Ray are there. The World Champ “wishes him luck” but warns him not to cash his title shot in on him. Bully says “He’s a bad man.”

Gut Check returns tonight, and we look at Adam Ohriner, who’s from Long Island. He’s pretty jacked.

X-DIVISION CHAMPIONSHIP: Chris Sabin © vs. Kenny King vs. Suicide
We have a rematch from the Ultimate X match at Slammiversary where Sabin won the title. I’m expecting a quick match but really these guys should get a good 20 minutes here. Don’t waste a title match with this talent on a six minute throwaway. Sabin gives King and Suicide a double drop kick in the corner, pretty stiff. The winner of this match gets a chance to cash the X-Division Title in for a World Title shot at the Destination X special on July 18. Suicide’s out of the picture and it’s King and Sabin one-on-one. Suicide tosses Sabin out and works solo with King. Kenny goes for a hurricanrana but Suicide reverses into a roll-up for the three count. Sabin isn’t pinned but Suicide is your NEW X-Division Champion. So Sabin makes a big return and his title reign lasts a month? Suicide can cash in the title shot.

The match ends, but then out comes GM Hulk Hogan. He’s with the kid who’s the REAL Suicide (TJ Perkins) and the guy who won the X-Division title jumped the real Suicide and took the suit. The Suicide in the ring ducks out into the crowd. It’s either Brisco or Bischoff probably and that is pretty genius. More Aces & Eights chicanery.

Back from break and we get a replay of the end of the X-Division title match, then backstage Hogan says “Suicide” has until the end of the night to reveal himself.

We hear from the other Gut Check competitor tonight, Ryan Howe. This kid looks familiar. He looks like a jacked up Bret Michaels, but I’ve seen him before but I can’t peg him.

GUT CHECK MATCH: Ryan Howe vs. Adam Ohriner
Howe comes out and plays the Star Spangled Banner on a Les Paul guitar. Wow it’s Van Hammer! Oh wait this guy can actually play. These matches look nice, but the whole judging thing is stupid. The last three times the match winner ended up getting booted. So why bother? Howe goes for a move off the second rope and misses badly. Taz keeps asking if that’s Van Hammer. Ohriner wins with a power slam and he clearly is the bigger star.

Backstage Sting and Angle are walking down the hall, and Sting says this incarnation will be better than the first one of the MEM. Well Nash isn’t there, so at least everyone’s quads will be in good shape.

We get the BFG standings, which were fixed from last week as Magnus actually has ten points due to winning by submission.

Bully Ray walks into the locker room to talk to TJ Perkins, and asks if the MEM put him up to tonight’s chicanery. He denies it.

We recap Velvet Sky’s saga with her knee and losing the Knockouts Title to Mickie James.

KNOCKOUT CHAMPIONSHIP: Mickie James © vs. Velvet Sky
ODB is your referee. There have been more Knockout title matches on Impact this year than WWE has had Divas Title matches on PPV. Velvet is favoring her knee but I see some Bret Hart “playing opossum” action here. Mickie is focusing on the knee when she’s in control. The TNA women wrestle like men. The WWE Divas (well most of them) wrestle like women. That’s the difference. This has been a very good match with multiple heat segments. Mickie puts that reverse Indian Death Lock move on and Velvet taps out. That surprises me. Velvet is heartbroken as she thought the knee was ok.

We get another backstage segment with TJ Perkins and the MEM.

Sting and Angle are in the garage, and out walks Bobby Roode. He stops for a moment to look purposefully into the distance, then walks off as Sting and Angle smile satisfactorily.

Back from break and Hulk Hogan is backstage with the referee who officiated the X Division Title match earlier, asking him for any clues as to who was under that Suicide mask. The referee had no idea and says it looked just like Suicide, so Hogan tells him to find whoever it was and tell him that either he’s unmasking by the end of the night, or he’s stripping him of the X Division Title.

BFG MATCH: Bobby Roode vs. Magnus
Magnus is your leader after one week. A win tonight gives him 17 points. Another submission win and its 20 points. I’ve never witnessed a full BFG series so I don’t now TNA books this where they go 50-50 and everybody’s close the whole time. It’s been a fun match with Magnus’ power vs. Roode’s grappling. Roode hits a spinebuster and Tenay calls it a “Double-R spinebuster”. I like Roode, but Tenay just blasphemed here. Wow Roode goes for the fisherman’s suplex but Magnus reverses into a sit-down power slam for the win. Wow that’s an upset I think. Magnus is guaranteed the lead after two weeks with 17 points.

Back from break and Bully Ray is starting to act a little paranoid, as he heads into the locker room with Anderson and DOC and they corner Chavo, Robbie E and Jessie. They want to know who Suicide is and none of them know.

In the ring is the World Tag Team Champions, Storm & Gunner. Storm says they aren’t scientists but he’s been called a chemist. “Jack and Cokes, women and beer add up to one hell of a time.” He also says “You don’t have to like your partner, just to watch your back in the ring.” He’s interrupted by Robbie E and Jessie Godderz with Tara. Haven’t these guys been fired yet? Well I guess they need jobbers. Robbie E questions the champs’ toughness. Robbie E makes the usual fool of himself and calls he and Jessie the future of tag team wrestling. He calls their team “The Bromance.” Storm questions that and Robbie E is backtracking. The crowd’s chanting BROMANCE but he meant the “Bromanz”. Storm says “A woman like Tara is what beer drinkers call in the bar a butter-face.” Jessie tries a cheap shot but Gunner chucks him to the floor. SORRY ABOUT YO DAMN LUCK. Love Storm man.

Sting and Angle are chatting about who’s under the Suicide mask and who the next MEM member is.

BFG MATCH: Mr. Anderson vs. Samoa Joe
I hadn’t seen Joe much in the first few months I’d been watching TNA but now he’s in the BFG Series so it’s a treat to see his matches. There are rumors of Taz leaving and it seems prevalent in his commentary. Instead of being a legit Aces & Eights heel he’s pretty much being a goof. Someone just screamed “TAZ YOU SUCK”. He responds to it. That’s funny. Knux and DOC come out to try and distract Joe, but they don’t get in the ring knowing a DQ loss is minus ten points. Out comes Sting and Angle and they battle DOC and Knux. They toss the Aces & Eights guys down their aisle. Joe hooks on his rear choke finisher and Anderson taps out. That’s ten points for Joe.

Sting and Angle get in the ring, and guess what? Samoa Joe has joined the MEM. Wow that’s pretty awesome. This is turning into some faction. Of course Tenay and Taz are no-selling it like the awful announcers they are.

Backstage where Joe is handed his new suit from Sting and Angle. They make Men’s Wearhouse cracks. Awesome.

Out comes Hulk Hogan and he wants to know who this “Suicide” is that snowed everyone over and took the X-Division Title. He cuts to the chase and calls out the new champ. This Suicide comes out with the X-Division belt around his waist. Hogan says opportunities are taken advantage of but cheating is something else. So he asks: “Who’s behind the mask?” He refuses but out comes Bully Ray. He says “For the first time in a while Dad and I are on the same page.” He asks for the mask to come off and Suicide refuses. Bully says “You won that title because I put the fear of him into Chris Sabin.” So just walk away. Hogan says take the hood off now or lose the belt. Suicide whispers “I felt the pain and the torment.” “Should I do the easy thing or the right thing?” He takes the mask off, and it’s Austin Aries? He cashed the X-Title in once before and he’s going to do it again. So on July 18 it will be Aries vs. Bully Ray at Destination X for the World Title. Wow what a shock. With that we’re out.

SCOTT’S TAKE: For once a great surprise ending by TNA as Aries maybe turned face? I’m not sure, but this was a solid show. Here’s the updated BFG Series standings:

Magnus             17
Samoa Joe       12
Anderson          7
Aries                     7
Daniels                7
Hardy                   7
AJ Styles            2
Jay Bradley     0
Hernandez       0
Kaz                         0
Joesph Park    0
Bobby Roode  0

Author: Scott Criscuolo

Scott Criscuolo is a co-founder of the Place to Be, co-host of the Place to Be Podcast, and was in the radio business for 10 years. He loves all things pop culture, and someday he will be the ghost writer for Triple H's autobiography. Send Scott an email