After a much-needed day off following the grueling “one article a week” schedule I’m keeping, it is now time for your weekly smorgasbord of wrestling talent and clips from other shows we call WWE Superstars. It is my deepest and most sincere wish that all of you at Superstars Nation enjoyed your Thanksgiving with your families. I also hope that like me, you were able to celebrate “Turkey Day the Ravishing way!” Tonight’s installment will be special not unlike the extraordinary though probably most assuredly unhealthy corn casserole dish my mom brought to the table last night for we are now post-Survivor Series and the road to title unification begins right here! So put down that leftover pumpkin pie and let’s head down to ring side!
Your announcers tonight are Tom Phillips and fresh off a stint on Main Event this week, the incomparable Alex Riley. Riley grabbed a frozen turkey from under the announce table and declared that he would award the “Alex Riley Frozen Turkey” to the competitor of the night. You won’t want to miss this one!
FANDANGO (W/SUMMER RAE) vs. ZACK RYDER
Ahhh nothing wakes me up after standing in line at Target only to walk out with dress socks like an appearance by Summer Rae. While I still intend to find the original “Mrs. Fandango” from WrestleMania and make her my future ex-wife, the lovely and talented dance partner of Mr. Curtis certainly is a sight for sore eyes. On Sunday she showed off her dance moves before a quick elimination but for those who remember her for NXT, you know this girl can work. But like all Divas nowadays, she is nothing but cannon fodder for the stars of that show I won’t mention. Anyway, she isn’t fighting here but her partner is leading us off for the second straight week.
But it’s stiff competition for his opponent tonight in Uniondale, NY is the home-town hero, the Long Island Iced Z, who still remains popular despite the fact that Great Khali has more TV time per week. Huge ovation for the Ultimate Broski who received numerous chants during the rather large program on Monday. If he had run out and grabbed both titles from Cena and Orton, the roof would have blown off the Nassau Coliseum but now I’m just being silly.
Fandango scored early with a spinning heel kick but it wasn’t long before our hero took charge of the match. A broski boot followed by the Rough Ryder and just like last week, we get a very short opener from two guys who easily could have told a better story with more time. WINNER: ZACK RYDER
They did this to throw Zack a bone in his hometown and good for Fandango for being a good sport. It probably won’t be long before Ryder is getting murdered in two minutes by Ryback or Alberto Del Rio all over again. On the bright side, we have a front-runner for the Frozen Turkey!
Did you know? WWE has more twitter followers than The Wall Street Journal, The Associated Press and McDonalds! Take that talking heads! By the way, you can follow me @DmcG4881. Just saying!
Our first Raw highlight takes us to the face-to-face confrontation between World Heavyweight Champion John Cena and WWE Champion Randy Orton. I’ll just come out and say it… I LOVE THIS! I might be the only one but we don’t live in the era of brand extension anymore. The roster isn’t as deep and people cross over from Raw to Smackdown all the time. The idea served its purpose and what better way to end it once and for all then to have your two biggest stars battle it out in order to crown one undisputed champion. The only flaw I see in this is that they might be jumping the gun on this one by doing it at TLC. Sure, HHH is selling it as a way to start the new year off right with one champion, but this to me sounds like it would be better suited for the Royal Rumble if not Wrestlemania. Listen closely, you can hear the collective letdown of the fans when this match was announced for the December pay-per-view instead.
After the break, we go back to Raw for the handicap match between the Wyatts verses The Best and The Beard. I am getting much more enjoyment from this rivalry than I originally let on. Their match at Survivor Series was awesome and it probably should have gone last since it all but sucked the life out of the crowd for the actual main event in Boston. I wonder where they decide to go with this. Turning Bryan heel, even if it’s involuntary like say a Bray Wyatt brain-washing angle, seems far fetched but they have to do something while Punk and D-Bry wait in the wings for the title picture to settle. The Shield’s involvement also guarantees that the most watchable portions of Raw each week will again center around these eight guys. Sorry Cena and Orton!
THE USOS VS. THE REAL AMERICANS (W/ ZEB COLTER)
Awesome! What a delicious dessert and a tremendous get for Superstars this week! Now that The Shield is involved more so with the Punk/Bryan/Wyatts angle, the next WWE Tag Team Champions are likely in the ring for this match. The Usos bring it every week but the Americans have become that swank heel team that fans actually like. Uniondale actually got a strong “We The People” chant going at the beginning of the contest.
Following a Hulu limited commercial interruption, the bad guys hit that awesome double team maneuver where Swagger hits the Swagger Bomb followed by Cesaro leap frogging over his partner’s shoulders and driving both boots to Jimmy Uso’s gut. Just awesome! That was followed by a sling shot into a Swagger powerslam that was also well executed. Jay Uso eventually got the hot tag and hit a Samoan drop on Swagger. Jimmy recovered in enough time to assist with a double super kick before throwing Cesaro out of the ring (uh oh, no Cesaro Swing?). Jay then flew three-quarters across the ring though didn’t quite reach Swagger. He landed awkwardly about a foot short but hit most of his man for the 3-count. He looked a bit shaken up after the pin but that didn’t stop those twins from clapping and hip-hop dancing their way to yet another future title shot. WINNERS: THE USOS
Our program ends with Raw’s main event featuring the competitors from the respective title matches at Survivor Series. I won’t harp on it but can Show catch a break? First he’s broke, he can’t deliver in bed, he loses his house, he gets fired, then rehired, nearly gets booed out of the building with Orton on Sunday and now he has serious head trauma following a Viper punt to the skull. I hate concussion storylines particularly since it’s a serious problem in all sports. It also makes for some awkward television. I’m not going to stop watching over it or anything but at the end of the day, it’s not my most favorite wrestling angle.
I’ll close with this since everyone else is doing it, I’ll join the party as well. I’m thankful for my lovely family who puts up with me being spoiled and continues to support me anyways. To my brother Chris, the “actual” writer in the family (check him out at www.cgmcginn.com), I’m thankful for all the laughs and gallons of iced coffee we’ve consumed over the years. I’m thankful for this website for giving me a chance to be silly at least once a week. I’m thankful for consignment stores and library book sales for allowing me to look like I have class without actually having to spend a fortune. And finally, I’m thankful to all of you who take the time to read everything there is to read on the internet including this guy’s WWE Superstars recap. This truly is a blessing. Thank you!